So I got saved.. and that means what? 

What does it really mean?  What's my identity now?  A friend said something to me upon telling her that I got saved... She said " That's nice but don't be too spiritual, and start lying to yourself.." So I asked her how much is spiritual, or too spiritual isn't that relative?..dependent on who's looking?

Then I remembered that He doesn't love me because I am a spiritual person.  But He is very pleased and happy when I trust Him and listen to Him. 

It's not about being afraid of God, it's about hating deception... It's not about not having passions and instincts - it's about choosing to be in control of them so I may keep myself stress free and God's temple undefiled..

It's not about me sinning, it's about me bringing that sin to Him and asking Him to forgive me.  Let's go over that one again.. it's not about why I lied or how small or big or yellow or red the lie was, it's about I lied when I should have said the truth.. and getting forgiven for that and making a resolve to do better in future.

It's also about addressing my reason for lying..for example about the experience on my resume - no it's not because I needed the job so bad..it's because I wasn't able to trust God to provide what He said He could. 

It is also not about praying in tongues, and miracles and signs it's about keeping the faith new each day.. The faith that Jesus loves me.. that I can trust Him. My battle is not to make sure I fast every day but to believe that He loves me - every day.. and that He is Lord every day and that we will do things His way every day. 

Am I right to think this way?  Can I support this with scripture..?  Please share...

So here I am.  It's a new year - and I am grateful, but the state of my country is deeply worrying.  My country has roughly 42 tribes that make up the Kenya.  During the elections there were three presidential candidates from three different tribes.  It's unfortunate that most Kenyans despite all our education voted for their candidate not on the basis of merit but because they belong to our tribe.  It's very very unfortunate because now two tribes are fighting each other - the Luo and the Kikuyu.  It's extremely worrying because I didn't choose to be born in the tribe that I belong to. but because of the bigotry that abounds we have chosen to kill each other.  How is the worth of a person determined by the language they speak?

Anyway for that reason I haven't been around - since I couldn't leave the house for fear of the violence that is now in raging.  There's a lot I am worried about - for starters I don't know what tomorrow will bring - I know for sure no one will be leaving their houses because of the rally that 's going to be at Uhuru "Freedom" Park.  I feel like a refugee in my own country and I am ashamed to belong to my tribe - because my people feel superior to the other tribes and the other tribe feels we need to be put in our place - I am caught in between and that troubles me.   

But you know what something that no one can take away from me is my identity in Christ.  I belong to the tribe of Jesus.  I am a Christian first and that is something I never need to be ashamed of.  At this time my strength is in prayer and the fellowship I have with other Christians.  It's funny how I can be happy and safe one morning and wake-up to madness the next day.  But Christ is faithful - He is and all will be well.  So I want your prayers guys - not a long prayer - tell God that I want Him glorified in my country.  I want His kingdom come in Kenya.  I don't care who is president at this rate .. as long as His - God - will is done and that my fellow Kenyans know Him and honor Him.  That's all I want..   

I feel something is happening ..Kenya has always been peace loving.  The burning of houses, the eviction of Kikuyus from their homes, rape,the looting the violence - the signature of the devil is all over - to steal, to kill to destroy.. but God is faithful and even though we might not exactly be at peace - I am glad that there is a remnant that has found their peace in Christ.  So though a thousand may fall at my side .. I shall not be moved ... Christ is still Lord... and He always most absolutely most assuredly most without a doubt  ALWAYS will be.  So no matter where I am whether in the mountains or the valleys under the depth of the sea or above in the heavens - He will be there and He reigns always.  NO MATTER WHAT ANYBODY SAYS - CHRIST IS MY LORD WAIT ACTUALLY HE IS THE LORD.

Dear God,

I must honor you today. Especially when I think about how you have changed my life. How I had nothing and I called on You and You answered me. I remember that day as if it was yesterday.. I was so lost and so down-cast and I really had no one to love me, or to care for me. I thought the best thing for me to do was to die. Then there was a breeze, a comforting cool wind and I heard You whisper - that God is here. Later when I got home.. I sat on my bed thinking.."Isn't it about time I died.." I asked myself "Why can't I get things right?" "Why am I always messing things up?" Why is life so hard for me? Why don't I just die? And then again You whispered and said, "You need God."

It was funny cause come to think of it I wasn't thinking about You, was I? No I wasn't. I was thinking about death and how I was going to slowly die a shameful death. I didn't care if the world hated me. At least I wasn't going to be here long anyway. And then you told me - that even if I was dying if I gave you the chance you would walk with me. That with You I'd be okay and that You would use me greatly - if I chose to walk with You.

On that day Jesus you were born in my heart. After a major test which I passed - You said something to me. "Go and sin no more." I was grateful for so great - a mercy. I told You I was going to follow You. When I did I was so scared but You strengthened me, I made a resolve there and then that I would live for You, because truly You are the Lord of 2nd chances.

Since then You have been walking with me and though it has not been easy - my life now has a new meaning, You have loved me and made me very happy. You have given me peace and restored me to such a state that I can now lift my head up. You have given me a reason to smile. You have healed me. You have told me that I can make it when I thought I couldn't. You're my number one fan. You believe so much in me, sometimes I wonder what You see in me, but hey you created me - so I guess I might be all that... and more..

And still Lord even as I continue walking with You, I know that there are many areas where I fail, where I am not all I should be for you, where I am not faithful.. and I am sorry because of that. I ask You to deliver me from these things also that I may surrender to You more fully.

But as the season that is here demands tomorrow the day that I have chosen to celebrate the day You were born, I ask You that I may honor You in a way befitting. For having saved me, for loving me, for the compassion You have had on me, for the sacrifice you made for me - who is the worst of sinners, Oh God. Thank you. for not witnessing enough forgive me Jesus - sometimes I am an unworthy laborer. But perhaps even by the testimony of what You have done and are doing in my life - someone else in the simplicity and awkwardness of my testimony will know of Your faithfulness and goodness. May Your power, Your Glory be known.

God I love you. You are worthy of all adoration. We sing praise to You, creator of the universe, the author of all wisdom we give you praise. You who created the stars and the majestic beauty we behold on this earth.. You who has created the things visible and the invisible, You who is above the laws, the principles, the strongholds and the thoughts that govern the whole universe and that outside it if there is such a thing. Most Excellent God, Most High God, The God who knows what lies beneath and above, within and without, Yahweh the Holiest of Holies, the Lord of Hosts. The God that makes man fall at Your feet upon beholding Your great love and righteousness today accept our praise. Today oh God, King of all the earth, King of my heart, receive Honor and glory and praise. Accept the fruit of our lips, the praise of our heart and minds - accept our Praise. We confess that You are God. My very soul magnifies You oh Lord, I worship You. Receive our thanks giving and our praises today. For You are all.

Ecclesiastes 12:13 Fear God and keep His commandments for this is man's all.

Psalms 118:17 I shall not die but live, and declare the works of the Lord

May Your name be praised yesterday, now and forever.

AMEN.